I like that Christianity is not an easy religion. It is one that does not give us all the answers, but rather, it gives us the tools to search for them. I always reflect on the story of Jacob, because I consider him the most perplexing Biblical character. In spite of his deceit, his trickery, his weakness, and his audacity, he was one of the three Patriarchs, honored by generation after generation. He was beloved by God, but he was the least admirable of the Patriarchs. Hamlet might make a better hero than him. But God chose Jacob, and that is a concept for me to wrestle with.
I’m going to talk about a few of the aspects of Christianity that I find incredible, and I’m adding in quotes from a book on Jacob by Madeleine L’Engle, called A Stone for a Pillow. Unfortunately, I can’t remember what book the first quote is from.
I have become wary of any brand of Christianity that offers easy answers or thinly disguised rules, or when solutions to problems are proffered the moment the anguish is verbalized. I also think of those who are afflicted and crushed in spirit, and how glibly others write off their turmoil and question their loyalties when they take too long to come out of their sorrow. Christianity allows time for mourning and sorrow and doesn’t require a short amount of time spent in it. It only asks that we learn and reflect in our sorrow, but we have our time to grieve.
What I believe is so magnificent, so glorious, that it is beyond finite comprehension. To believe that the universe was created by a purposeful, benign Creator is one thing. To believe that this Creator took on human vesture, accepted death and mortality, was tempted, betrayed, broken, and all for love of us, defies reason. It is so wild that it terrifies some Christians who try to dogmatize their fear by lashing out at other Christians, because tidy Christianity with all answers given is easier than one which reaches out to the wild wonder of God’s love, a love we don’t even have to earn.
It’s a religion that allows me time, flexibility, and peace to think and understand. It gives me a safe place to voice my emotions, however ugly they may be, because I am not condemned by them any longer. I can shout, scream, rant, rave as much as I like, but I am not prohibited from verbalizing my emotions. I can wrestle all I want.
God can take my most fumbling, faltering prayers and make something lovely of them. Jacob had to learn that prayer is not bargaining with God. He had to learn that the God he finally decided to accept as his own was not a God who could be tamed.
It gives me principles and wisdom, rather than a list of regulations. It forces me to struggle with questions, rather than giving me easy but unsatisfying answers. It’s a religion that preaches listening before thinking and understanding before preaching.
If we want to play it safe, we have to settle for a comfortable religion, one which will not permit questions, because questions are universe-disturbers…If we don’t allow questions, we can fool ourselves into thinking that we are capable of defining God.
I have no doubts about the majesty, glory, or sovereignty of God, nor of the value that is inherent to life. He placed a value so high on life that only the purest form of life, represented in the shedding of blood, was satisfactory enough to redeem a multitude of lives.
If we truly understand what Jesus was saying, we know that what matters is not moralism, but understanding that God with infinite grace can work goodness through us. Goodness is of God; we cannot make ourselves good through an act of will.
It allows me the freedom to sit and consider another’s thoughts and to examine all angles of an issue. I am wary of any community that promotes “discussion” as thinly disguised proselytizing, that welcomes comments for a moment then proceeds to give a canned answer. None of this means that I do not believe in absolute truth; on the contrary, I relish it. It gives a foundation and grounding to my life. While there is a place for correction and teaching, there is also a place for questioning and contemplation. Far too often is one prized above the other.
Scripture asks us to look at Jacob as he really is, to look at ourselves as we really are, then realize this is who God loves. God did not love Jacob because he was a cheat, but because he was Jacob. God loves us in our complex isness, and when we get stuck on the image of the totally virtuous and morally perfect person we will never be, we are unable to accept this unqualified love, or to love other people in their rich complexity.
What are your impressions of Christianity, Christians, or Christian communities that you’ve observed or been involved in? What have you liked, and what have you disliked? What conclusions did you come to?
To make common said:
I find it interesting that Jacob was blessed for wrestling with God. Great post Leigh!
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Antigone's Clamor said:
Yes, John, I think that so often we forget how creativity and critical thinking are valued by God. As Christians, we are to think critically *every day*. He’s not satisfied with simple, thoughtless answers or automatic replies…He wants our hearts, our minds, and our very souls.
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granbee said:
Antigone, our church’s midweek Bible study is extremely lively and full to bursting with questioning and contemplation! I love that. I also love that we are observing Lent in very quiet, focused ways to prepare our souls for filling with all the glorious light of Easter morn! I am very pleased you chose Jacob, such a mixed up guy on the surface and yet a true servant of God. Kind David was such a one, as well. Contemplation and questioning formed much of Jesus’ prayer time, we are told.
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Antigone's Clamor said:
Granbee, that’s so nice to hear! So many churches do not encourage questions; they simply want their members to write the answers down and spit them back when told. Lent is a good season of quiet for me as well.
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Brother James said:
Marvelous post, Leigh! Wrestling with God is a tricky business, and Jacob is crippled in the process. It’s interesting that only a crippled Jacob can be reconciled with his brother, and return home.
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Antigone's Clamor said:
Thank you, Brother James! I think your point about reconciliation is good. It never occurred to me while I was writing this post.
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Elisa Nuckle said:
I can’t tell you how refreshing it is to read this. And the timing is interesting. A pastor my mom likes to watch on TV recently did a sermon that I found utterly appalling. When my mom asked why I was so pissed, I explained. Basically the pastor said that, by “complaining” about our problems, we are shunning God and kicking and screaming like children instead of reacting in a Godly way. His example was about an instant reaction. Your husband gets into a car accident, and instead of thanking God in all his mercy that your husband is alive, you complain about your husband getting into the car accident in the first place.
What he called “complaining,” to me is just simple anger and confusion. I mean, isn’t it natural to ask those questions to God? Of all the beings in this universe to ask.
Anyway, before I get ranting, my point is that I really, really love how you explained Christianity. I feel like Christians miss the point. We’re already redeemed not because we did something to deserve it or to keep deserving it (by not “complaining” and always thanking God even when it’s not sincere), and it’s nice to hear I’m not alone in this.
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Antigone's Clamor said:
Elisa, thank you for commenting! Good to see a new face on the blog. That’s a great point you bring up about the tv preacher. I think though, that while we have these natural questions, it’s also important to come to conclusions. His conclusions weren’t wrong, I don’t believe, but the guilt that he stirred up by his speech was not right. It wasn’t a conviction of sin; rather, it was an unthinking response to grief.
I love your point that we didn’t deserve our own redemption–grace is too often forgotten. Saved or unsaved, we are all products of some form of grace.
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David said:
“I am wary of any community that promotes “discussion” as thinly disguised proselytizing, that welcomes comments for a moment then proceeds to give a canned answer”.
Thank you for saying that! Though it is easy to get caught in that kind of mindset (of giving canned answers that is), when we stand firmly on our foundation, which is Christ, he speaks through us and touches those hearts He wishes to speak to as only He knows how. We need only to step aside from ourselves and allow the Lord to use us which is easier said than done, I know! This is where wrestling, searching, learning and growing all come into play).
Great post Leigh!
(Interesting that Job being the oldest or at least one of the oldest books in the Bible completely explores the idea of religion and why it doesn’t hold water. Jesus was the most anti religious man that ever lived. Religion in and of itself holds no answers. Only Jesus holds the answers and we are to come naked and without pretense. I love how personal our God is!)
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Antigone's Clamor said:
Glad you commented, David! When we deal with those who are hurting, canned answers only pour salt in the wounds. The answers don’t change, but the way we think about them should change and morph according to experience.
The Book of Job is full of unconventional replies to the same question…that are Truth. Glad you brought it up!!
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bardessdmdenton said:
Questioning goes to the core of belief, the process of seeking and spiritually growing.
I love investigating the saints, their ‘stories’ so full of their human frailties as much as their saintly visions and actions.
‘God loves us in our complex ishness, and when we get stuck on the image of the totally virtuous and morally perfect person we will never be, we are unable to accept this unqualified love, or to love other people in their rich complexity.’
Thank you for sharing such an inspiring reflection.
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Antigone's Clamor said:
Well, you can’t grow much until you question and think through things now, can you? Yes, the best stories are about the saints who struggle. Listening to someone’s idea of perfect Christianity (rather than reading about it in the Word) or watching a “perfect” life (which is usually just smoke and mirrors anyway) doesn’t do us many favors. Thanks for the comment!!
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Antigone's Clamor said:
Reblogged this on Antigone's Clamor.
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